I didn't imagine, I would be spending my entire day in the computer room. I really never knew that. Like I said, I had a lot of work and it did really take up the entire day. I sat inside at 11am and I wasn't done till like 8pm. I still wasn't able to finish my own tasks as there were several discussions about the Sports Meet held inside the computer room itself for my convenience. I still have a few more to go.
I just wanted to spend my last week with the kids more. I really hope Wednesday would go as I planned to. I was having interviews the whole day. I did about 30 people in total. I was glad. I have a about ten more to go for tomorrow. Anyways,my last guest was an interesting character. Apparently, he was looking all around for me yesterday. He came in as my last interviewee for the day because he spoke and spoke and spoke. I was really happy. He told me many things that is personal to him. He kept saying he wouldn't usually tell anybody he such things well yet he did. He said I would understand that's why he told. I was happy that I could be that person for him to talk to. I realize these kids really need the personal space with an adult apart from all the jokes they crack with each other.
Frankly speaking, you will never guess these kids have gone through whatever they have at such young ages because that's what they are. They are all full of smiles and what they do beast is teasing and cracking jokes about others. I am not kidding. They will keep pulling my hair, putting glitter on my face or like shouting at the same time. It is not peaceful around them. It is "madness". Haha. In a good way of course. It is amazing how these kids have that face behind all the happiness. Sometimes I wonder if these kids are really happy or sometimes I wonder if these kids have really gone through the war period. I have never seen such amazing fighting spirits in my life.
I was talking to another boy who started crying while I was in the room. I asked him what was wrong. He refused to say anything for ten minutes. He just kept crying and crying and crying. I had no clue what was bothering him, whether did his friends say anything or he is worried about studies or he is reminded of home. After some time he said, he is sad that I am leaving. I was touched. I truly was but at the same time I was so upset. I was so upset having to think that people whom they love never stay with them forever. I feel like I am going to disappoint them in many ways when I leave. I am really eager at helping them from there but I know it won't be the same with the kids. One month is seriously not enough with these children.
When I always said go study to the kids, I realize I forgot how it is to study. The boy was telling me he is just upset that his family is all over the place and he has no parents and he feels there is no reason for life. I right now at my age sob over the fact that I am not close to my family and that they are all over the world. So I just imagined how it is for this 16 year old boy? How about the rest of them?
I was studying in boarding school, where I can go back home on weekends. Yet I hated it. I hated my entire two years I was there. These kids, sometimes don't see their parents for months. The youngest kid here is 7 years old and she sees her mum probably once in every two weeks or less. I was always missing home in boarding school and I found it stressful just thinking about. Most have single parents her, a few with no parents at all, some with their siblings captured and others who don't know where they are, so in this situation can you expect a kid not to worry about home?
They love being here in Puloly because it is certainly, one of the best "homes" I have seen but it is definitely not the same living with family. I really felt bad when the boy was talking about how he can't concentrate on studies because of all the feelings he has locked up in his heart. This is the case for a lot of them here. We are the type you get stressed out even if we have haze during certain months but these kids have gone pass dead bodies, limps everywhere, land mines and stuff and yet they are expected to study even in camp. Imagine the state of mind these kids here are in.
I totally forgot. Its easy to say study well, but in this time now, it is the biggest challenge for the kids. I am planning up a studying scheme for the kids. I am hoping that it will really help them. Every kid here talks about education being their life. Every single one of them is here for one reason, to be educated. All of them, even the 7 year old says all he wants is education. They see the importance of it even in such a young age. I don't know what to tell these kids, because I think even I wouldn't be able to go pass this phase in my life if I had one even. Only God can show them the way...
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